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Jake x Reader Robots are Matchmakers

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Yo, there be some cursewords in here, alright? alright, enjoy the story~

---


You look at the poster on the board and sighed.

Today wasn’t going to be very good for you

It was the annual festival that came around this year every time, you and your large group of friends would go.

However, the occasion is you bring someone with you as a date, girlfriend/boyfriend, well, you get the gist.

Once again you’ll have to bring Lil’ Seb as a buddy to the festival

Why? well you see, everyone else had a relationship.

Dave had grown a pair and asked Harley to be his girlfriend

John had actually hooked up with Roxy, much to your amusement

Rose had Kanaya, and you had to admit they were so cute together.

You knew that Jake had a certain pointy shaded Strider and Crocker pining after him.

You’d admit you wish you could have a chance.

However Jake did have a Girlfriend, much to your dismay.

It was Aranea Serket, and holy shit from first glance you knew she was only going to hurt him

But anyway, that’s about it for the status of relationships.

Or so you thought, when you entered school

You approached Dirk and Jane to ask if you could borrow Lil’ Seb again this year but were shocked to see them in a short kiss

“Hey can I b- holy shit, what are you doing?”

Jane looked up at you “well, since neither of us want to ruin our friendship over this silly thing, we realized we didn’t need Jake and got in a relationship” she said

You smiled a little “Oh, cute, by the way, can I borrow Seb again this year?” you asked

They looked at each other “actually, Seb’s with Brobot at Jake’s, You’ll have to go get him there.” Dirk said

Great, the last place you wanted to go to that would remind you of your crush.

“Oh, alright, I’ll make sure to do that” you said

You then realized you were now the only one not in a relationship.

Throughout the day you sulked, knowing you’d never have a chance with anyone, much less Jake English.

John seemed to pick up on your mood

“Hey (Name), you alright?”

“Hn? oh, Yeah, I’m alright” you said

“You don’t look like it’

“I’m just really tired, you know. Big day today”

“Oh, yeah! totally, also, Roxy wanted to take you shopping right after school”

“I gotta pick up Lil Seb at Jake’s house first John”

“Sure, we’ll pick you guys up there!”

“Yeah, alright”

That brings you  to now, standing at the door of Jake’s home

The door opened and you saw the cute little robot bunny, which apparently dragged you inside, much to your confusion.

You looked down to the little bunny who hopped up to the standing robot, and pointed to it.

“I-uh..not really catching on to what you’re trying to say, Seb.” you said, trying to piece together what he was trying to say

He then points to the poster, himself,to the larger bot, then finally at you, and repeated this pattern until you finally got what the message was

“You want Brobot to come with us to the festival this year?” you guessed

Seb nodded rapidly and points to him, Brobot nodded lightly

“And he wants to come too...well, alright, but you need to behave, I won’t tolerate you in sparring mode and going for strifes. Understood?”

The two nodded and Lil Seb went and set Brobot to casual mode.

You then heard a loud honking of a car outside, that must be John and Roxy.

You started to walk out the door “You two stick with me ok? Roxy wants to pick some fancy shmacy thing out for m- agh!”

You were cut off when Brobot had picked you up and instantly got you in the car. John gave you a questioning look at the scene in front of him

“...He wanted to come along, okay? Just go and get this over with” you muttered as you buckled in

--Timeskip of looking for an outfit for you---

This was hectic, nothing seemed to be right for the occasion.

“Rox, this isn’t necessary, I’ll just be in my jeans and hoodie again this year, it’s no big deal”

“N-Nooo way (Name). Y-ya always wear that stuffs. You need to get looking gud dis year” she said, looking through the things.

John had put the last 9 outfits back on where he looked “I have to agree (Name). It’s no fun if you keep lurking like you do. Besides, don’t you want to achieve your goal of getting your ‘secret crush’?” he grinned

You lifted your head “How do y-”

“You ranted a lot when you got drunk from the spiked Faygo. Too bad that you practically knocked yourself out before you said his name” he continued grinning “Also, I saw your resolutions list”

You looked down at your feet “..It wouldn’t matter, he’s taken anyway, I never really had a chance.”

Roxy and John exchanged looks, knowing these kind of things was a bit of a trigger for you.

You felt a rush of wind behind you, and then again by you, before a third came to a halt behind you once again.

You were spun around and had some things pushed in your arms

Okay, now you were concerned on bringing brobot

You looked at what was given to you, and you felt a slam of emotions hit you

Why did he pick these..!

It was a Green dress that went down to your thighs, it was sleeveless but came with a thin gold color over jacket. The dress had golden accents on the bottom and neck of it.  It seemed to come with a belt but it wasn’t there.

It practically screamed Jake in every way.

“Ah- Brobot, this really is nice of you but I don’t think I-” The said robot put his hand over your mouth and pointed to the changing rooms

“...You’re going to make me get in this one way or another, aren’t you?” you stated bluntly

You got a short nod in response.

-POV Change, to someone who you wouldn’t expect!-

The thin line of a mouth curled into a small smirk

“She better thank me later for this, since obviously my other idea’s went down the drain”

“Dirk, she might try to kill you first” Jane said, as they watched the video feed from the laptop screen

“Hey, making her jealous sure didn’t work. Let’s not forget to mention she doesn’t know Aranea dumped Jake, and that was weeks ago..it’s clear her avoidance seriously didn’t help.”

“Well, I know...but are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Of course it is” the Blonde stated

-POV change back to you-

You couldn’t deny the dress was absolutely nice on you, but it still reminded you of Jake and Jake only.

Roxy clapped happily “It’s perf! That’s definitely the one!” she said, grinning.

“I..I don’t know…” you said, coming out of the dressing rooms in normal attire.

“Are you kidding? You look freaking sweet in it” John said

You started to speak when the cursed robot put the dress in a bag, holding a receipt up

“Y-you already bought it!?”

John chuckled lightly as Lil seb held a smaller bag.

-Timeskip-

“Wow, (Name)! You got a dress from the aspect collection?!” Jade said, grinning

“The what now?”

“The Aspect Collection. Where All Kinds Of Clothing Are Based Off Of The Aspects.” Kanaya said “I Believe I Have Mentioned I Design Many Of The Attire Sold”

“Oh..like the uh...one’s you’re wearing?” You said

Now that you looked at your friends, they did wear the said outfits, with the aspects.

“If I’m correct there’s supposed to be a belt with that dress.” Rose pointed out

“I think Lil Seb is keeping it right now. It’s like he doesn’t want me to see it yet.” You said

“That dress looks exactly like th-” Dave had started speaking, but was silenced by Jade, who giggled

“Come on! lets go have fun!” she said

You all Split up, but what you noticed is brobot had gone MIA

Sighing, you picked Lil Seb up and started the normal routine.

---POV Change--

Well this was bloody unwell, not only was I dumped, but she was practically using me to get things! Well we’ll see how it goes, Aranea. Maybe dating her wasn’t smart...I should have listened to my heart and mind  to ask out a girl I actually liked.

Speaking of her, where in the bloody devil dickens was she? I couldn’t find her anywhere.

But no worries, as Jake English, I will fix this confounded mess I have made.

I walked around looking for her for hours, the girl with (Color) hair.

I started thinking about my choices

I remembered specifically of the shattered look in her eyes when I announced I was in a relationship.

Not one proper conversation  ever came between us afterwards.

Golly, I was so stupid to ignore my heart’s advice!

Oh! There she w-

Oh..she seemed to be with Lil Seb again, and she doesn’t seem to be enjoying herself either..

Wait a bloody minute, that’s an aspect dress.

Not just any dress, but a Hope aspect dress, my aspect.

I nearly jumped out of my skin when a far too familiar rush swept by me.

Blinking a few times, my jaw dropped

What was Brobot doing here!?

With (Name)!? I wasn’t about to stand for that nonsense!

I didn’t get very far though, since I was pulled back and my sight was covered

--POV Change, You~--

“Oh, there you are Brobo-- What are you doing”

The robot had placed his hands on my arms and lifted them a bit, Lil Seb finally took out the belt, unfortunately I didn’t see the aspect on it since Brobot then blindfolded me and started leading me somewhere.

What were these robots doing? It was driving you nuts!

After a while of walking, you were suddenly sat down. Okay, from how it felt you were on a hill, grass, and a blanket.

You felt something thud against the spot next to you

After a few minutes you could finally see

Oh

Oh god

In front of you was none other than Jake English, looking about as confused as you were

“J-Jake?” you stuttered

“(Name)?”

You continued to stare at eachother before he had spoken

“(Name), golly I uh...it’s been awhile huh?”

You silently nodded

“You haven’t really spoken to me at all, why?”

“.....I was trying to stay out of the way” you said

“Stay out of the way? What ever do you mean?”

“Aranea Serket”

The second that name left your mouth, he tensed “She’s dead to me.”

Your head snapped up “W-what?”

“She was using me, the bloody wanker, I should have listened to you instead of following that stupid blue obsession, I was wrong to even consider her to be my girlfriend, I should have chose you”

You were shocked “Sh..she did? Y-you think that?” you gulped “B-But I have nothing to offer you, I-I’m just a nobody at school with a stupid childish crush on you since I know I’d have no chance with a guy like you an-”

“(Name!) That’s not bloody true!” he grabbed your hands

“You are by far the cutest girl I’ve met, how you shrink into your pullover hoodies and draw in class, when you cling to me  when we’re on some kind of thrill ride, or a movie, how you rely on people is just who you are.”

You couldn’t speak...did he mean it..?

“There are many things that I love” he trailed his hand up your face “These eyes that glitter in the light” down to your throat “The amount of laughter, sass, and beauty this voice holds” he placed his hand over your right ear “These ears that listen to my voice” up to your forehead “This mind that continues to baffle me.” He then places his hand over your heart “Your heart that beats gently for friends and booms with fire at a threat”

Your face was on fire, Jake’s cheeks were heating up at his own words, but he kept his focused gaze on you

“While I love adventure with a burning passion, and I always follow the path for adventure, You, (Name), are shy, clouded with mystery, and when people think they know you, you burst with the unexpected. What I’m saying, is you, are not ordinary. You’re an adventure” His face was inches from yours

“J-Jake I- I don’t know what to s-”

But just like that, you felt something push the back of your head forward, and the same went for Jake as the two of your mouths were quickly pressed together into a kiss

For a few moments you two were much too shocked, but had eventually melted into it.

The presence left your head as you two separated

You both turned to see Lil Seb bouncing excitedly and Brobot standing there, giving a thumbs up

“Y-You blasted Robot! G-Get out of here!” Jake stuttered, face red as ever

A voice fritzed out “It’s about time, English, you know you two would have never made a move, so you’re welcome for this. Also, you’re such a cliche sucker English”

“Dirk!?”

A laugh resounded “When you two are done face sucking come on down, we’re going to be waiting for you” At that the bots were gone in a flash

“T-That blasted strider! Just you wait! I’ll flip you into a death pit an-”

You gave Jake a kiss to silence him “Shh...he meant well” you smiled

Looking down at you, he returned the kiss “Well alright, You look absolutely stunning right now in that Hope dress.”

You looked down to the buckle to see it was indeed the Hope aspect

“Mh, You look nice yourself” you said “Let us go and enjoy ourselves?”

“Be my girlfriend first?”

“Of course, Jake.”

You two stood and Jake looked over to you

“You’re not going to let dirk off easy, will you?” you said

“Of course not, but that goes for you as well~” he hummed before looping his arm around your waist

“Wait, what?”

--Bonus--

“Get back here strider! I’m not done with you!”

“Holy shit Jake, put the chair down”

“Good luck to you (Name)” Dave mused “You guys might be together but he won’t show mercy”

“How bad could it be?” you said

Jake had come up behind you “We’re going to have to make up for all the time you avoided and you messing with my head like that~”

“...Oh”
Yeah, I did another one

Can't stop me Rose's Creepy Eyebrows Icon 

Haha, I hope y'all enjoy my oddball ways

I don't own homestuck, all homestuck characters belong to Huss

But you just might belong to Jake English, my friend

Comment on whatcha think
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PARRRRRRRRRTTT 2